Choosing to Tell it Like It Is

If you ever prayed that you would be able to talk clearly and forcefully, Matt can be an answer to your prayer. He is a three-year-old who came down with the flu--- the type that includes nausea as one of its symptoms. This family lives in an old house with a rough-textured plaster wall finish. One morning while his parents were busy getting the older kids ready for school, Matt threw up, with most of it hitting the wall near his bed. As his mother cleaned off the wall later, she asked, "Oh, Matt, couldn’t you have made it to the bathroom?"

He said, "Mom, you don’t understand. It keeps coming up, and it just blows your mouth open!"

Being understood is something we all hope for. This child can teach us how to help another person understand us.

• We need to make the attempt. If Matt had remained silent, his mother would not have understood.
  
• He did not get angry. To become angry is to fight; to say nothing is to run. Both running and fighting are hard on families. Instead of reacting in these dysfunctional ways, we need to respond, as Matt did.
  
• Matt’s succinct, accurate description --- "It just blows your mouth open!" --- gave his mother an immediate understanding of why Matt did what he did in his predicament. The stakes are high at home and at work. Matt shows the way to help others understand: with a friendly voice describe specifically and clearly what is happening inside you.