A Grandmother Summer

Katy, my seventeen year old grand daughter surprised me with an offer I needed to think about. "Gram I'm going to take care of you at the lake this summer." Initially it didn't seem like a valid offer, a first ever "to be taken care of."

All kinds of questions surfaced. Did my children see me in need of being cared for? Was I ignoring the signs of aging? Until the moment of this offer I'd felt quite capable. If I accepted "caring for" would I be giving up control? Katy had heard, seen or felt something which prompted the offer. Did this come from love and concern for me?

I surely did need computer organization of my writings, poetry, stories, letters and journals, many unedited in the computer brain. There was that special autobiographical diary written by my mother in her last year. That called for transcribing. Questions and responses related to the diary explored our roots and faith. There were an endless amount of "to dos". Companionship -- what a plus!

I conferred with her Dad who helped me make a "contract" about work, free time and remuneration. She was at liberty to accept or make changes in the terms. Katy was giving up a full summer job and college expenses would soon be a reality. "Mom," her Dad spoke straight to the point, "if you were to hire someone with her computer skills, plus housekeeping to say nothing of companionship, that could be an expensive proposition."

More questions surfaced. What would it be like to give up my singular independent life and develop a relationship with a teen-ager? What would we talk about? Would her vegetarian diet restrict me? Were her driving skills adequate? Could we share the summer worship services I appreciated?

The contract was created and agreed upon. We would have independent morning hours, breakfasts and lunch but we would take turns at dinner preparation. I would add a bit of meat to the pasta, good salads, veggies and fresh fruit enhanced with conversation was a well balanced diet.

I recognized that my faith at work was being put to the test in day to day living with a grandchild -- a minimum size small group for "one anothering". And when I leave a heritage for Katy, it won't be the article which has import. 

The invaluable legacy, the difference we made in each others lives sharing a Grandmother-Grandaughter Summer.

Adaline's book, While It Was Still Dark, conveys her encounter with separation & loss in a succession of sharply limned images. She doesn't discourse about grief, she evokes its many moods.